“Yeah, well…I’m watching your ugly mug right back.” Artwork (c) Mark Dallmeier

WordPress gave me my stats for the year.

I had 11 views that originated in Russia and the most searched-for terms in 2013? “we declare you a terrorist.”

Clearly, FSB knows I’m out here.

I also had 4 views that originated in Pakistan, 4 views from India, and another 4 from Saudi Arabia. And 2013 featured me writing a 10 minute play with CIA agent characters set in Pakistan.

So I guess that ISI, JIC, and GID know I’m out here too.

And then there was Better Homes & Homelands at the Drama League’s DirectorFest, helmed by the exquisite Nicole A. Watson, who–most exciting of all–did me the honor this year of saying, “Yes, she would.”

Which reminds me, we should add NSA and the “Subdivision Committee” to this list because they’re watching everybody.

With stats like those, I guess that 2013 was a pretty successful year and I’m way more popular than I thought.

So Happy New Year to one and all and here’s to more peaceful, political dissent and theatrical dialogue in 2014.